Thursday Thoughts Fall 2018

Lately I have been reflecting on some of my less beautiful thoughts.  Thoughts that I would rarely share for fear of judgement for lacking gratitude for the multitude of blessings in my life.

I am strong, and I am brave and today I am going to expose myself and share my burning desire to passionately and unapologetically celebrate life for all of it’s wonder and mystery.  It is my hope that you can relate, or maybe share your thoughts, and together we can encourage and celebrate each other.

For as long as I can remember I have wanted to see everything, feel everything and be present in every moment.  To smell the smells, to hear and sing all of the sounds, to eat, and laugh and connect.  I long to discover ways that I never knew existed, to understand and be understood, to love and be loved.

I have no desire to slip securely into a monotonous comfort of my routine; to sit down and observe life. As I see it, to live this way is not living at all but rather a slow descent into nothingness.

It seems almost impossible to be bored when I am so busy, or that I could be alone when I am almost always surrounded by others. My life is bursting with many of the things I have wanted, needed, built and been gifted, but sometimes I feel like I am no longer a part of it at all.

My essential being, my soul, my spirit has been edited out of my life and suddenly I am reduced to nothing more than expectation and obligation.

To accept the fading embers of my passion for life is to allow myself to slowly die, and I am not near ready. I want to see and be seen, dance and love the way I believe we are meant to love each other. In the words of my mother “life is to be lived” and I intend to do just that.

Sending love to you and yours from beautiful Summerville SC,

EJ

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